Hello there again, this is your co-author Bisexual Beauty. I'm terribly sorry that I've been inactive lately, as you may or may not know, I'm in school and I've had a lot of troubles with my classes as of recently. This is just saying I am still here and kickin, and I'm planning on blogging a lot more often! :D
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This blog has been on hiatus for a long time and people may think this blog is a dead-cause. I have news for all of you. This is just the beginning! Consider this blog on semi-hiatus. Whether or not I have a co-author, this blog will still live. I have so many things to share with all of you. It may not be what you want to hear and I may be rejected in all kinds of forms, but I do not care.
I want to change the world. I want to make a difference. If I stay silent or walk away, this world may stay the same. I can't bear to see my future children in a world where people are attacked for who they are. This blog may not be perfect, it may not look how I want it, and it may not be the best. However, perfection is not the reason for this blog. I want to share my story and my thoughts to change someones life.
I will come back. Promise.
Amber
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"I don't care if you're black, white,,straight, bisexual, gay, lesbian, short, tall, fat, skinny, rich or poor. If you're nice to me, I'll be nice to you. Simple as that." -Eminem
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Hello Lovelies.
Sadly, it is time for me to take a temporary hiatus. This is not permanent, however. I will be back and will continue on writing.
I need this hiatus. I need to stop, take a break, spend more time with God, do some research and studying, start writing on some of my articles, and take time to focus on college. There is some growing that I need to do before I continue further.
I figured this is the perfect time to take a hiatus, since my new co-author is on vacation for at least a month. It wouldn't be fair to do this when she comes back, so this is a great opportunity to take a break.
I need to rethink the purpose for this blog, what I really want to accomplish, and tap into listening to the Holy Spirit.
I DO NOT follow rules/regulation set by man in a book. I follow the HOLY SPIRIT and I need to strengthen my faith. I have been questioning my faith lately...and that is a good thing. It is a good thing to ask questions and think. What kind of life would it be for a Christian to never answer questions and act like a mindless robot? I believe God wants us to ask questions and to rebel against controlling Religions.
I also need to save up for some upgrades for the blog. If you want to donate, you can go here: http://www.gofundme.com/bspg2o
I am also going to stay off social media for a bit as well.
Keep an eye out for the blog's return!
Remember: GOD LOVES YOU and does not hate you. There is nothing wrong with you.
Amber
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Throughout life, we all go through our own journey. Some of us believe in fate and chance, while others rely on faith. We all face difficulties in our journey; they make us who we are. We can either choose to let it make us stronger or let it break us. In my opinion, I believe what I am going through right now is going to make me stronger in the end. I repeatedly have to keep asking God for strength, because I have been tempted to give up. My strength is weakening, my faith is on the rocks, and I have fears. Every day seems like a huge battle for me and I feel lost. I feel like I am stuck on this road leading me to my destiny. I do not know which road to take and I am nervous to take risks. I didn't used to be this way, but life brought these fears upon me. I do not want to be a failure. I do not want to be who everyone wants me to be. I want to be me, but honestly, I am scared to be me.
I am questioning my faith, but I believe it will help me in the end. I know God exists and He is amazing; however, I feel like an outsider. Many churches are still in that religious mind-set. They want that control and can't stand it when they do not have the power. In the past, religion was used for control, to keep people in line, and to fulfill selfish desires. When I say selfish desires, I mean that the Bible would be used to ban or promote issues for their own ignorance. God is always portrayed as hateful, greedy, and judgmental. Manifest Destiny, slavery promotion, and interracial marriage ban are just a few examples of that. Now, the Bible and God's name is being used as an excuse to hate anyone who is part of the LGBT community.
I am starting to question certain things and just ask a lot of questions in my head. I know for a fact the Bible was tampered with and is still changed to this day. For example, in the King James Version, it says do not put markings of the dead upon your body (Leviticus 19:28). However, if you look at other new versions of the bible, it says something different. It mentions tattoos instead. I find that odd. That is just one of the many examples I have seen that has made me believe the Bible is manipulated. Now, I do believe The Bible holds the true word of God. However, we need to admit there is evidence the Bible has been changed and is continuing to change.
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Please accept yourself. I will accept you for who you are. Be yourself, love. Stay original because copies are not the same. They might look the same, but they are so different. Would you rather be a miserable copy or the original masterpiece God created you to be. You choose.
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As I am sitting on my bed, thoughts are entering my head. Am I making a difference? Is this blog a waste of time? Should I just give up? The main reason I started this blog was because I wanted to make a difference. I know everyone is not a Christian or believes in God. However, there are people who do believe God exists. If there are people out there who think like I used to, I am pretty sure they believe God hates them. Rejection is a horrible thing to face, especially when it comes from a God who is supposed to love you. When I thought God hated me and rejected me, I was miserable deep inside. I had thoughts of suicide, fear of rejection, and I felt like I could never measure up. I am a bi-sexual Christian and that is not "normal" in society. There are people in the LGBT community, as well as in Christianity, that do not accept bi-sexuals. Someone has to make a stand and say something.
There are children and teenagers who have gone through what I did. I would never wish that kind of pain on anyone, especially children or teenagers. It is my hope that someone who feels rejected, hated, or confused will see my posts. I want them to accept who they are inside and to love each other. I can't quit now, because if i do, I will regret it forever. I could save someone today. I could save someone tomorrow. Everyone should know God loves them and he doesn't look at sexual orientation or color.
I will admit that I have a little bit of fear this blog is doing nothing to help others. However, I do feel God put it on my heart to do this blog. I am stepping out in faith to do this project, instead of beating myself up for who I am. God works in mysterious ways and He works through people who others discard as trash or lowly (1 Corinthians 1:28-29). I am not perfect. I do not know it all. I did not go to a Bible college. However, Jesus picked people to be his disciples that the Pharisees did not like. The only person the Pharisees liked ended up betraying Jesus. I have to hold on to this hope that this blog will change a life. It means so much for me to make a difference, because I do not want people to go through what I went through. No child or teenager should have to hate themselves.
People may get annoyed that I keep repeating to accept yourself. However, someone may need to hear it. If people accepted themselves and had love in them, there would be less crime and havoc in the world. I may be right and I may be wrong, but I have to speak my mind. Someone has to speak up. I may be wasting my time. However, if Martin Luther King had that same mentality, maybe we would still be segregated by color. Stick to your dream and make a difference!
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